How to self isolate with your kids and not go crazy!
Wow, can anyone actually believe this is happening? A few weeks ago, self isolation wasn't even a concept I was familiar with. Now it's a buzzword meaning so many different things for different people.
For us, it means working from home while simultaneously keeping 3 kids healthy, educated and not killing each other in confinement.
I absolutely LOVE school holidays so naturally, the idea of having 4 weeks to hang out with the kids excites me! However the reality of our situation changes our normal school holiday adventures and means we will have to be more thoughtful and creative in how we approach this time at home.
Firstly, I am so reminded (by my 5 year old's sudden outburst of tears at the fact that Burger King is closed for a few weeks), that the kids sense something is going on. They don't have any context for the scale of this pandemic, the fact that it's worldwide and that for many people, this means loss of income or worse, loss of a loved one. They do however know that their world is changing. Initial excitement over potential closure of schools turned to real disappointment over the cancellation of their favourite sports and more recently, the breaking of the news that Noah won't be able to have his family and friends over to celebrate his 8th birthday on Monday. Whether we realise it or not, the kids pick up the atmosphere we create in our homes and family. If the radio is on in the car with constant reports of death tolls, tense conversations with family and friends are overheard about adult worries of finances and health... the kids will naturally have feelings of anxiety that they won't be able to put words to. It's so important to help journey our little people through the truth of what is happening but with the lens of hope and anchor of family. Talking about 'our family team' adventuring out to get groceries in the crazy supermarkets or helping them come up with ways of helping people who may need a hand, of course, praying and answering questions about what's going on, at bedtime, are all ways we can get down on their level and help them make sense of their rapidly changing world.
Secondly, we will all be at home. If you are like me, and at home with kids, then let's be honest, we need to prepare! Part of any success whether in business, finances or family, all comes down to preparation. That most definitely doesn't mean everything goes according to our plans, but having a plan helps us to feel in control and gives us options.
This is one of those situations that we can do absolutely nothing about. We can either go through four weeks frustrated and flustered or we can choose that these four weeks will be full of memories and treasured times together that the kids will talk about for their whole lives. Yes we will have pressures they will know NOTHING about in these next four weeks, yes we will be trying to balance work and kids and will sometimes be unsuccessful but we can all put some plans in action to make sure our time with our kids is meaningful and that we come out of this situation stronger as a family unit than we went into this.
So here are some of my plans and tips for surviving the coming weeks!
1. Schedule it!
This may be a nightmare for some creative parents but believe me, kids thrive off structure and routine. Even a loose structure or routine is better than nothing. Remember, these are not normal school holidays. These are uncertain times and kids will thrive off the stability a structured day, brings. This can be as loose as just labelling each day of the week such as;
Monday - Nature Day (where maybe you plan to get out on a nature walk and collect some cool things)
Tuesday - baking day (at some point in that day, the kids know to expect to bake with you
This may also look more like a timetable for a structured day, and I've seen a lot of these floating around. Here's a few I like the look of especially for when the 'holidays' are over and the learning needs to be facilitated.
This helps with kids being able to anticipate when things like meals, snacks and screen time are. Not knowing this means they are more likely to ask you ALL day. When they can see what's coming up later, they are often able to wait for it.
2. Stock up the crafty cupboard if you can!
I don't advise going crazy, because you really need to weigh up the amount of time the kids will spend on activities verses how much you spend on supplies. I find spending around $20 at the $2 shop will give you a good range of bits and pieces to keep in a box for those moments where you need to change things up. Some things on my list for tomorrow's $2 shop dash are;
- balloons (you can pop kids in the bath, at any time of day, with water balloons that they can fill and play with. Or you can fill them with sand and tie them up, making stress ball creatures that they can draw faces on with vivid).
- crepe paper & glue (cutting different colour squares and sticking them inside a picture is great for littllies hand/eye co-ordination as well as some fun for the bigger ones doing a mosaic type picture. And anything where you have to cut individual little squares and stick them all on something, will buy you some serious time).
- umbrellas (this was my sister's idea! Fantastic for rainy days, why not buy each of your kidlets a $2 umbrella for a walk in the rain)
- activity / workbooks (the $2 shop has a fantastic range of note books, activity and colouring books that would be great to whip out when the kids need some mental stimulation).
- paints & chalks ( these are no brainers and there are endless things you can do with paints. For chalk, I am going to buy some tape and do the activity below).
- face paints (this is a great activity for the kids to do on one another or for you to do for them)
- straws (for blowing paint in an art lesson)
The list is endless, really.
3. Audio Books
Although we are huge fans of reading in our family, I am also a huge fan of audio books. I often just search for them on Youtube. You could either download one and go for a drive and kids can listen to them, or you can put it on while they work on art projects. It's one way to give them a break from talking and fighting and to just relax and listen to something.
4. Nature is not off limits!
Although people are off limits, nature is not! I checked this out and until we hear of any instructions to stay in our homes, we are allowed to head to a beach or nature walk as long as we aren't with other people. We are absolutely point for choice in New Zealand for incredible walks and spots to explore. One of our favourite activities is crab hunting in rock pools or making stick huts and forts in the local bush. Kids will spend hours on a project, especially incentivised as a competition. Why not get stuck in with them, build a sand castle, skim some rocks, walk a track, go for a bike ride.
5. Skills
Of course education is important and all our kiddies will have work from school to complete over this time. One thing I think is so fantastic is the opportunity to add to our kids skill set, the things we do for them everyday or things we once learnt but that have become a lost art. I remember learning knitting as a child, at school. I learnt how to sew. I learnt how to cook by cooking with mum and then following simple recipes in books. There are dads out there who could spend a whole morning showing kids how to change a car tyre, how to check a car's oil and water. The family could spend a good few hours doing all things automotive and cleaning the family car. If you love to cook, why not call your kids in, one at a time to help with certain, age appropriate steps in the recipe? If you can't cook, why not find a recipe together that you can attempt? One thing I will definitely do, is teach the kids how to sew a stitch by hand. A couple of old towels can be cut into squares and they can practise. Sewing kits are also found at the $2 if we don't have them already lying around.
6. Art Attack
One resource my kids loved last school holidays, was teaching themselves to draw by this clever Youtube channel. They spent hours looking up all different ideas and learning to draw, step by step.
For us, it means working from home while simultaneously keeping 3 kids healthy, educated and not killing each other in confinement.
I absolutely LOVE school holidays so naturally, the idea of having 4 weeks to hang out with the kids excites me! However the reality of our situation changes our normal school holiday adventures and means we will have to be more thoughtful and creative in how we approach this time at home.
Firstly, I am so reminded (by my 5 year old's sudden outburst of tears at the fact that Burger King is closed for a few weeks), that the kids sense something is going on. They don't have any context for the scale of this pandemic, the fact that it's worldwide and that for many people, this means loss of income or worse, loss of a loved one. They do however know that their world is changing. Initial excitement over potential closure of schools turned to real disappointment over the cancellation of their favourite sports and more recently, the breaking of the news that Noah won't be able to have his family and friends over to celebrate his 8th birthday on Monday. Whether we realise it or not, the kids pick up the atmosphere we create in our homes and family. If the radio is on in the car with constant reports of death tolls, tense conversations with family and friends are overheard about adult worries of finances and health... the kids will naturally have feelings of anxiety that they won't be able to put words to. It's so important to help journey our little people through the truth of what is happening but with the lens of hope and anchor of family. Talking about 'our family team' adventuring out to get groceries in the crazy supermarkets or helping them come up with ways of helping people who may need a hand, of course, praying and answering questions about what's going on, at bedtime, are all ways we can get down on their level and help them make sense of their rapidly changing world.
Secondly, we will all be at home. If you are like me, and at home with kids, then let's be honest, we need to prepare! Part of any success whether in business, finances or family, all comes down to preparation. That most definitely doesn't mean everything goes according to our plans, but having a plan helps us to feel in control and gives us options.
This is one of those situations that we can do absolutely nothing about. We can either go through four weeks frustrated and flustered or we can choose that these four weeks will be full of memories and treasured times together that the kids will talk about for their whole lives. Yes we will have pressures they will know NOTHING about in these next four weeks, yes we will be trying to balance work and kids and will sometimes be unsuccessful but we can all put some plans in action to make sure our time with our kids is meaningful and that we come out of this situation stronger as a family unit than we went into this.
So here are some of my plans and tips for surviving the coming weeks!
1. Schedule it!
This may be a nightmare for some creative parents but believe me, kids thrive off structure and routine. Even a loose structure or routine is better than nothing. Remember, these are not normal school holidays. These are uncertain times and kids will thrive off the stability a structured day, brings. This can be as loose as just labelling each day of the week such as;
Monday - Nature Day (where maybe you plan to get out on a nature walk and collect some cool things)
Tuesday - baking day (at some point in that day, the kids know to expect to bake with you
This may also look more like a timetable for a structured day, and I've seen a lot of these floating around. Here's a few I like the look of especially for when the 'holidays' are over and the learning needs to be facilitated.
This helps with kids being able to anticipate when things like meals, snacks and screen time are. Not knowing this means they are more likely to ask you ALL day. When they can see what's coming up later, they are often able to wait for it.
2. Stock up the crafty cupboard if you can!
I don't advise going crazy, because you really need to weigh up the amount of time the kids will spend on activities verses how much you spend on supplies. I find spending around $20 at the $2 shop will give you a good range of bits and pieces to keep in a box for those moments where you need to change things up. Some things on my list for tomorrow's $2 shop dash are;
- balloons (you can pop kids in the bath, at any time of day, with water balloons that they can fill and play with. Or you can fill them with sand and tie them up, making stress ball creatures that they can draw faces on with vivid).
- crepe paper & glue (cutting different colour squares and sticking them inside a picture is great for littllies hand/eye co-ordination as well as some fun for the bigger ones doing a mosaic type picture. And anything where you have to cut individual little squares and stick them all on something, will buy you some serious time).
- umbrellas (this was my sister's idea! Fantastic for rainy days, why not buy each of your kidlets a $2 umbrella for a walk in the rain)
- activity / workbooks (the $2 shop has a fantastic range of note books, activity and colouring books that would be great to whip out when the kids need some mental stimulation).
- paints & chalks ( these are no brainers and there are endless things you can do with paints. For chalk, I am going to buy some tape and do the activity below).
- face paints (this is a great activity for the kids to do on one another or for you to do for them)
- straws (for blowing paint in an art lesson)
The list is endless, really.
3. Audio Books
Although we are huge fans of reading in our family, I am also a huge fan of audio books. I often just search for them on Youtube. You could either download one and go for a drive and kids can listen to them, or you can put it on while they work on art projects. It's one way to give them a break from talking and fighting and to just relax and listen to something.
4. Nature is not off limits!
Although people are off limits, nature is not! I checked this out and until we hear of any instructions to stay in our homes, we are allowed to head to a beach or nature walk as long as we aren't with other people. We are absolutely point for choice in New Zealand for incredible walks and spots to explore. One of our favourite activities is crab hunting in rock pools or making stick huts and forts in the local bush. Kids will spend hours on a project, especially incentivised as a competition. Why not get stuck in with them, build a sand castle, skim some rocks, walk a track, go for a bike ride.
5. Skills
Of course education is important and all our kiddies will have work from school to complete over this time. One thing I think is so fantastic is the opportunity to add to our kids skill set, the things we do for them everyday or things we once learnt but that have become a lost art. I remember learning knitting as a child, at school. I learnt how to sew. I learnt how to cook by cooking with mum and then following simple recipes in books. There are dads out there who could spend a whole morning showing kids how to change a car tyre, how to check a car's oil and water. The family could spend a good few hours doing all things automotive and cleaning the family car. If you love to cook, why not call your kids in, one at a time to help with certain, age appropriate steps in the recipe? If you can't cook, why not find a recipe together that you can attempt? One thing I will definitely do, is teach the kids how to sew a stitch by hand. A couple of old towels can be cut into squares and they can practise. Sewing kits are also found at the $2 if we don't have them already lying around.
6. Art Attack
One resource my kids loved last school holidays, was teaching themselves to draw by this clever Youtube channel. They spent hours looking up all different ideas and learning to draw, step by step.
7. Challenge fun
It is unrealistic to think everyday is going to be fun and games. But that doesn't mean we can't plan a few fun days in the mix! One of my kids absolute favourites at the moment are the Norris Nuts. They're a family from Aus who have kids the same sort of ages as my kids. They do all sorts of fun, family challenges and are just so much fun to watch. We have done more than one of this family's challenges that they've posted up. Why not pre-pick a video, let the kids watch it, then plan to copy the challenge for the rest of that day. The kids will have a blast!
8. Sorting and re-arranging
It's amazing to think of this as a planned activity but the kids actually really find things like this satisfying. Even if it takes a little bit of time to get their buy in. If you announce that the morning is going to be sorting toys and books and clothes, I can assure you, if you give them the 'why', that you can bless a family in need, the kids will help you go through their rooms and sort things into what they want to keep and what they're willing to give away. Being so sentimental, I struggle with these days! But it's a real therapeutic activity and you end up making an almighty mess and then ending up with a lovely decluttered house. Littlies can get involved in sorting toys like doing puzzles and putting all puzzles in the correct boxes, putting all lego in a box, all cars in another box, all train pieces in another box... we have a lot of different boxes... The kids can also help you go through clothes that don't fit them or that they never wear. You can box them up and have them ready for an op-shop run after self isolation is all done!
9. Journal
Another therapeutic thing for kids to do, is to journal. This is true for adults as well. It's a way of processing, reflecting and getting out of our heads what is on our minds. This could be a fun thing to do with kids at a set time each day. Not only is it a way for them to practise literacy skills with writing, spelling and then drawing a picture of their journal content, but it is a way they will be able to look back at a historic event one day and remember their time with their family. You can do it over breakfast or after dinner. Maybe even in bed as you put them down for the night. Let them write a few sentences about what they did, how they felt, if anything bothered them, what made them happy, what made them laugh... so many ideas. This is always such a precious way of seeing what is going on inside our babies, things they find important or noticed. It's a way of keeping on top of how they're processing things too.
I essence, there are so many ways to connect with your kids this next month. If we approach our time with them, with that as the goal, we find it flips from being, 'how can I entertain you' to being, 'how can I connect with you.' One of the things we need to remember, to avoid burn out is that we do not need to be at our children's beck and call, playing with them 24/7 and catering to their every request. This is where schedules and routines help. If you plan to sit down and engage with the kids every second or third activity, you will find, with fuller emotional tanks, they will be more likely to run off and play by themselves, rather than hugging your legs while you're cooking dinner and nagging at you while you try hang up washing. Your morning may look like waking them up, and instead of getting straight up and into chores, cuddling with them in bed and talking about you day. Maybe you sit and read them a story over breakfast or drink your coffee while you watch them play. You may give them some chores or set some sort of activity and tell them if they do that until the timer goes off, they can choose a puzzle for you to do with them. You can do this throughout the day, in between getting work and chores done. Remember, another tip is that asking kids to help with chores is the quickest way to get them to run off and play... I'm sure you've worked this out too. Give them a list of two or three things you want done and make sure you stick to your guns getting their help. Teaching them team work and responsibility is one of the greatest ways we can empower our young people to be contributing members of society.
I hope and pray some mamas who were initially daunted by the thought of all this time with your kids, will feel like you have some ideas up your sleeve to help you make these next four weeks, the best ones your family has had, yet. After all, it's all about perspective and how we approach it that will determine what sort of time we have at home with our kids.
I also cannot stress enough, the importance of reaching out over this time. If you don't have a Facebook or Whatsapp chat with some like-minded mums, create one! Make sure you encourage one another, touch base with one another during the week and FaceTime for chats over coffee. Stay connected. Stay full so you have something to give. This may look like tagging out with your partner so you can get a 10 minute walk alone, into your day. It may mean being disciplined to wake up 30 minutes before your minions so that you're in a good mental headspace to tackle the day. Maybe you need to implement, like I do, mandatory quiet time, midday where kids take a time out, are not allowed out their rooms and I can just sit in silence for 30 minutes. Whatever you do, look after yourself.
None of us have ever been in this position before. It's all new and it can be an incredible family adventure that teaches our kids some amazing values and skills and creates memories that they'll treasure forever. This is the power we have as mums. It's also so important to know that you have everything inside of you, needed for your kids at this time. You got this.
Stay safe and we'll see you on the other side :)
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